Wedding invitations, fuck em. Guess what soon to be and current marrieds - as singles - we hate getting this shit in the mail. In the time of email and texting it's rare to get a letter addressed to you, and true, when you pull that shit out of the mailbox you are stoked.
That is, until you see the front. The part where it says "Your Name plus Guest." Fucking guest right? You can already feel your brain searching for a potential date, and no one comes to mind. It's maddening, and it makes you feel like a lonely piece of crap (no matter how full your life seems).
I always had a back up for weddings, a friend of mine I have known for years who has been my constant date. He's perfect for it. He's a great friend of mine, we laugh together, he dances, and he knows my entire family since he's essentially a part of it (long time family friends). I will say that I never experienced too much anxiety because I knew I was single, but covered.
I could save the sad choke back of lonely tears for the wedding ceremony alone and I would be good otherwise. Things changed, the day I got his wedding invitation in the mail.
The wedding invitation, was not sent to my apartment, despite the fact that I moved out almost a decade ago. The wedding invitation did not have a plus guest, in fact the invitation was addressed to my parents plus me.
That's right folks, I am the plus one, and I have plus none.
The sad part of it, is that this now meant the last TWO weddings I've been invited to (in a list of many) there was no plus one. Prior to this my friends sent me an invitation for a wedding out of town for just me.
I guess I am so chronically fucking single the people in my life don't even bother to place a date option for me. I am the poster woman for dateless. I am the embodiment of Bridget Jones, and here I stand, alone, just like the cheese.
I was unable to make the first dateless invite, but indeed I attended the wedding of my long time wedding date.
My father was ill that day, and so my mother let me know not to worry, she would be my date. So now I've gone from plus one status to backup plan or pity date, fuckin eh.
We were not seated together and within the first ten minutes I found myself standing alone in a wedding hall full of couples. Couples and me. Just like the invite.
I am not sure if you have ever experienced the feeling of complete loneliness, but at that particular moment, I felt it, and I felt it deep. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes, I could feel my throat closing in and was sure my nose was already red in anticipation.
I stood there, motionless in my party dress and high heels, completely alone. That's when I saw him, across the room. He was there, on his own, and now was my chance.
I walked as fast as I could in shoes I never wear, and found myself face to face with him in the back corner of the hall.
With no hesitation, it came out so easy. "I'll have a white wine, and can you just fill that shit up to the top so I don't have to come back as much?"
He smiled.
From then on, my night was great. So thank you, to the bartender, who didn't judge my binge drinking to escape my sadness.
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