Surviving Solo - A Singles Guide to the Doctor

It's important to know how to be healthy as a singleton. If you suffer from Spintstosis (chronic singledom) like I do, you know that it is indeed important to keep an eye on all areas of health. It's tough to do, because you have not the live in partner required to assist you with certain things. When you get ill, you are aware you are "alone."

When you were little, and you got sick, (if you were lucky like I was) your parent/guardian would immediately call the doctor, make an appointment, drive there, hold your hand and remember your health card, get your medication (and it didn't cost you a thing) then take you home.

When you are single and you wake up not well, it's a battle. If you have to work that day, it's an even bigger task. If for example, you wake up with no voice, how are you going to call in sick? (they will get weirded out if you keep calling and saying nothing, you may end up with police at your door).

If you are shitting yourself silly and are in need of medication or at least ginger ale, you have to risk that ride to the store alone with the constant threat that you may shit your pants (note: should this happen to you, drop everything, and leave the store, do not attempt to complete your mission, ABORT ABORT).

There is also the task of having no one to bring you anything. I complain and moan and the cat just looks at me like I'm insane, No one to at least heat up some freakin cup o soup for you or bring you crackers. I know, boo hoo, people with kids etc. I am not here to complain, I am here to offer my support.

I may be thirty, but today, my retired father drove me to the clinic to the doctor after my mom called in to work for me as I indeed had lost my voice. So the solution to the sick and alone problem: Know your supports. 

It doesn't have to be a parent (although I did laugh when my father sarcastically said "Would you like me to come in with you?" after I got called, actually I may reconsider this choice next time). It can be a friend or co-worker. It's always good to know someone's cell from work so you can text in a case of no voice.

In a case of stomach flu anything, find someone you love, and who loves you no matter what state they see or hear you in. Friends are good for this, bonus if you held their hair back in college while they tossed up two dollar drafts (in the case where this was YOU, then your friend should be use to it by now).

Aside from knowing your supports, prepare for illness in your humble single person dwelling. This means, stock up on goods. Head down to your local shop of the pharmacy available kind, and grab a bunch of stuff. Get it all, I don't care if you don't have herpes now, you might tomorrow. Of course by that I meant, pick up cough/cold/flu medication, halls, pain relief, a stocked first aid kit, ointments (just grab one of each) and don't forget the ginger ale. If you need it, you'll want it flat anyways.

Think outside the box when shopping for these items as well, aka don't forget the duct tape. Also make sure you are specific to your own needs, for example I tend to fall down a lot, so I keep ice packs and tensor bandages in excess amount (that and I always toss in some extra cat food, your welcome cat). 

You may want to consider stocking your freezer with popsicles as well, if you get them in the early fall right between popsicle season and flu season, you almost forget they are stuffed all the way back there behind uneaten leftovers. When you get sick, your brain is hopefully trained from childhood to want them, and you will recall the one's you already have. It's almost like someone else got them for you, classic!

The last and most important thing you can do when single and sick, is rest. The benefit of single kicks in here full force. Since you are alone, no one else is sick, and if no one else is sick you don't have to look after them. If no one else is ill there is no way for you to catch it again once it's ripped through the family.

When your single, you can lay down, toss on the price is right, enjoy some popsicle or ginger ale action and rest easy.

For more information on Spinstosis consult your local library.